Is Today MY Day?

Last night I started a 'nap' as soon as I arrived home and parked in my bed; only, I found myself waking up four hours later! Thankfully, there was some energy back above reserves, so I could go on a walk, go to the gym, do some research-however after shifting focus several times and gaining no traction, I decided to go back to bed and get up early. Only, I found myself waking up 12 hours later with a headache and low mental stamina! What is with this cycle of fatigue, brain fog, and overall low tolerance for life??

I remember a time when I felt like ANYTHING was possible. My soul was vibrant and my heart on fire! Not everything was perfect though, let's not confuse those two states. I just want to know how to get myself 'back', you know, 'find' where she went.

Truthfully, I don't think we 'lose' ourselves; I believe we are all born completely pure, with the ways of the world putting its marks on us as we go through life. Depending on our convictions, dedications, and overall stubbornness, we choose whether to accept that marking and submit to its affects, or to push it off and move on, changed by the experience in outlook only, rather than internal reflection.

So, what would the process of cleansing, reclaiming, ethereal buffing, etc our souls be? Well, I don't honestly know- and I'm tired of giving that answer, as it does not honestly 'give' anything. It steals every moment of my life and leaves me feeling swept up in a huge game of 'pawns' with all forces that be. That is, my lack of conviction leaves me feeling bad that I ever judged the 'Factionless' from Divergent's lowest spot on the totem pole.

I don't just want my life back; I want the life I've been silently wishing for in the past two decades. I want to inspire others with my mental purchases to be more than my situation. I HAVE to get there, it is an urgency. And I thank you, Reader, for following me along to this point; Whatever you are struggling with overcoming, I do sincerely hope that you will be rid of the feelings and thoughts that have not served you. Please always remember to help yourself and others build a filter in their Mind, Heart, Spirit, and Soul so that we can continue to Do Great Things.